Back to My Path

I am a terrible blogger. There is no denying it. Sometimes I struggle to tell my story. I know there is a benefit of writing it out, especially when I find myself struggling.

Finding oneself and the journey to True is not easy, but very likely doable.

I have been struggling lately with my self worth. I feel like I am not a part of something or even all that missed when I am not around. Deep down, I know this is not true since people do invite me to participate in activities and to get out and about. I need to find the positive energy within myself to join. Currently not finding my inner or outer beauty and this pity party I am throwing myself is not really me either.

Routine. That has been missing lately and a big culprit in my current state, I do believe. So. Gotta get out of this silly sorrow and get moving again. Moving for me. Moving so I can be me. Moving so I can enjoy others and they can enjoy me too.

Fear. I am afraid. Always afraid of rejection and not being good enough. Even if there is nothing to fear, it lurks anyway. I think this is Ed's new disguise. I will not allow this to have control.

Back to my journey to me. To True. To Life.

Slacking

I've been slacking big time! Slacking on my blog and slacking on my journey. I'm still happy and love my workout regime. Just need to prioritize my time for grocery shopping and meal planning. Goal for next week!

This time I am going to be real and honest and stay accountable. I am going to stick with this new blog and let out the ugly truths as well as the not so ugly truths. I know I have a journey ahead of me and I know it won't always be easy. But I am determined to clean up the clutter in my life by holding on to what's important and letting go of what doesn't enhance or improve me. This will not always be a pretty task and may sometimes rock me to my core. I have already begun to make some of those tough choices and it's hard. I am not a person who likes to just let go or quit on anyone or anything, however I realize it is sometimes necessary. I will also call myself out on my shit because I do not always practice the self care that I preach. I need to have a real gut check from time to time and this blog will help keep me accountable. I have come such a long way and realize I still have a ways to go. Really going to focus on remembering I'm not alone, to ask for help when I need it, keep pushing when I want to give in, and be ok with being proud of any small step I make in the right direction. This is the beginning of the journey to true...my true self, my true passion, my true happiness...